- Kokomo Tribune - Article List
- Speeches, appearances, etc.
- Judging history
- "One Year Later"
- WFHB - Daily Local News Stories
- Subscribe to This Burgess
- Ukiah Daily Journal - House of Burgess blog archive
- Anderton Leaf Photography
- The Rob Burgess Show
- Society of Professional Journalists - Member
- Kokomo Tribune Website Awards
- PGP key
- Kokomo Tribune - City Editor/Editorial Board Member/Opinion Page Editor
- Indiana Lawyer - Managing Editor
- Aug. 24, 2016 tornadoes
- NUVO articles
Monday, August 29, 2011
Picture of the Day: Can opener fail
We haven't had what you'd call the best luck with can openers.
That is to say, we haven't had something that didn't eventually fall apart in our hands performing the one job it's put on the earth to do: open cans. That's it. That's all I've asked it to do: perform the function from which it derives its name.
But I digress.
Our most recent disappointment arrived recently when the replacement can opener we bought at Target crumbled in our hands. We turned the crank, but this time instead of opening the can, the plastic surrounding the base of the blade cracked and flaked off piece by piece. We were barely able to open that one last can before it all went south for good. There was nothing left of the device by the end. You could turn the crank, but the only thing you'd be opening would be your imagination to the idea of buying a new can opener the next time you left the house.
And now it came to this.
Since we still needed to open a can even after this, we did the next best thing: forced the can open manually. No crank; only the force of a lever and leverage. It's probably not supposed to open whole cans. We did anyway. We had to.
I'm happy to report that we've since purchased a heavy, relatively expensive can opener, that has yet to be removed from the packaging. The device that performed the above pictured surgery is going back to the store. I kept both the packaging and the receipt, for once.